No. I’m not talking of an ex-boyfriend. Still, it’s the feeling you get when an awesome opportunity has been missed or wasted. Then you feel like punching yourself in the face yelling “Idiot!!”
Okay, let me explain: I went to the UK in 2010 for the end of year holidays. I spent the whole month of December there. It should have been nice but I hated it. There were numerous reasons for my bitterness and displeasure…but when I think about it now I see I was just being selfish and immature. I could really have enjoyed it. (Screaming “Idiot!!!” in my head )
Let’s see what my ‘good reasons’ were- yeah they seemed really good back then…
1. I wanted to spend time with my friends.
The end-of-year hols in Mauritius last about 2 months..sometimes a bit more. They’re the summer holidays. Free from tuition, teachers, constraints, rain, homework and so on. I had made plans; going to the beach, enjoy the sun, go to the cinema, take dancing lessons, hang out with my friends, do sleepovers, well have fun! with my friends!
That’s probably why I got mad when I was told I was going to England with my younger sister. England+ December= Winter. I had been looking up for the super Mauritian sun and all I would be getting was cold. Icy freezing cold! I remember thinking ‘that must be some kind of joke’ but it wasn’t. It was all so real and soon I was shipped to Southend-on-Sea. In the cold(when I got there it was 2º and in Mauritius it must have been 35º). Far from my buddies, with 4hours of time difference when I was online most of them were already sleeping.
I started the whole thing with a certain animosity. I didn’t want to be there but I was there. Let me act as if it was hell.
But that’s a wrong attitude! That’s NOT the way I should have acted! I should have made the most of it, adapt myself and try to enjoy. There are loads of fun things to do in Southend-on-Sea. There’s a theme park with roller-coasters and other fun stuff like the seafront. Even in winter it’s quite something!
2. I found the snow to be quite a pain in the ‘hum-hum’
Snow. Amazing snow. Beautiful snow. At least, that’s how they show it in movies. Okay I concede that untouched snow is quite a sight:
But dirty snow sucks..it’s dirty and so uncool. Besides I had never seen snow before so dirty snow was a harsh bursting-of-the-bubble for me 😦
And snow can be dangerous. I bet I’m not teaching anything new to most of you reading but bear with me. I didn’t see snow that way before and I didn’t like what I was seeing…
We couldn’t take the car to go to the supermarket so we all- my godfather, my aunt, my sister and me- had to walk. My aunt had lent me her special snow boots so I was fine but my sis kept slipping around and she finally fell down. She wasn’t hurt though-but she could have been- and I was LMFAO!
Then there was the day when we went to Riverside- it’ a really big shopping mall in the shape of a giant boat- by car. And the road was super slippery. There were many car accidents that day. I saw 14 cars crashed on the side of the road. I was scared. I didn’t want to die that way, that day, that place(where nobody knew me)! + The traffic jam was insane and the cold was piercing through my socks+stockings+boots. Not cool. Not hot either actually 😉
But actually snow is terrific and I had fun playing in it.
And now I’d give anything for a bit of snow.. The Mauritian heat is killing me a slow, painful and hot death..
3. My little cousin was being a pain in the ‘hum-hum’
Look, he was about 2 then and he was a tad bit(I might be downplaying it 😉 ) spoiled. I guess that’s okay for such a lil’ guy but remeber I was already pissed out by the whole UK-thing that I had a hard time bearing with him. He just won’t listen, won’t obey, won’t eat his veggies, won’t brush his teeth, won’t remove his coat, won’t remove his shoes, won’t put on his coat, won’t put on his shoes, won’t stop throwing the ‘effing’ shoes at my face, and he kept switching the channels on TV. Not a day went by without me feeling murderous. I swear. He’s a little devil.
But now, I haven’t seen him for more than a year(he’s in UK and I not) and I miss him…a lot. How is that even possible? Maybe because he’s my cousin and I still love him no matter what… And maybe it has to do with his cute high-pitched ‘I love you! I miss you! Come to my home quick!’ on the phone… When he says things like this I wish I could just go and hug him but a 12-hour trip just won’t do it.
And flipping through the photos I realised: he did obey sometimes…
Then last but not least:
4. The fashion issue
Winter is all about pants, coats, scarfs and caps. I had really cool t-shirts but nobody could see ’em. And there’s a thing about me: I don’t like wearing pants. I know, I could have worn skirts and stockings but I’m just a rookie: I was too cold for that so I stuck with the pants. I was frustrated.
Warning! Stupid behavior detected! Yeah…No point in being frustrated over pants. I should have taken it better and bought cool pants 😀
Besides I did a LOT of SHOPPING there! My suitcase just wouldn’t close afterwards :$
The fashion issue is also about my hair… It needs a whole lot of preparation to be fit to be seen and I couldn’t do my hair routine. My hair was left to curl and dry uncontrollably and soon I was a wild sight
Thank God my aunt’s sister, who lives near by, has neat hairdressing skills and after a brushing I looked ‘okay’ enough for Christmas 😀
-To see the extent of the change compare with the red-coated freak int the photo above. Oops just noticed there were two red coats. I’m the one with glasses. 😉
So these were the main reasons of my immature hostility to wintry UK and now I regret all this time wasted on sulking 😦
I wish I could go back in time and apply what Christian Furchtegott Gellert once said: ‘ Live as you will have wished to have lived when you are dying!’
So remember; don’t make my mistakes! Even when you’re stuck in a situation you never wanted to be in and that you hate just relax and make the most of it! You might be losing on an amazing experience! Just live your life to the fullest so that your regrets won’t hurt 🙂